Content Warning
Content on this page may be triggering to some. This story includes violence and drug use.
I walked outside to discover dead animals strewn everywhere in the yard. I knew the cause: a giant all-consuming salamander had entered out home. Using basic instruments from around the house the salamander had disguised itself as a person. It was in our house, eating everything we owned, capable of teleportation and electric expulsion.
I eventually discovered the salamander’s location, in my parent’s bedroom underneath their bed. I pulled him out from beneath the bed, beginning to punch him. But I was too weak, they gained the upper ground and began wailing on me. One of my punches happened to knock a small case out of their fanny pack: a case full of drugs.
Instinctively I opened the case and consumed as many of the drugs as I could—all the while the salamander watched in horror. Time slowed down, nearly to a halt, and I began beating the salamander to a pulp, even stuffing drugs into its own nose, eyes, and mouth.
After having drugged the salamander nearly to its own death it teleported away and time went back to normal and I met up with my family. We learned that it hadn’t actually eaten anything. It had been storing all of the items it stole under the floorboards of the kitchen, presumably to eat at a later date. I grabbed an obsidian katana from the stash it had beneath the kitchen and began prowling around the house to finish it.